"If I Had $1,000,000..."

(all quotes: Barenaked Ladies, If I Had $1,000,000)

If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)
If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you furniture for your house(Maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice Reliant automobile)
If I Had $1,000,000 I'd buy your love.

Bobby Revell of Revellian tagged me for this one and I don't usually just do a meme for an entire post (I don't even do many meme's actually), but I figured it would be an easy one to write and not too emotionally taxing. I couldn't sleep because the bones are rattling loudly in my closet, so I thought I would get this one out of the way, or try. Music (usually) helps when life is at it's worst, so I'm also taking the chance to use the lyrics to an awesome and hilarious song (not the spoken parts, since they change sometimes... sorry).

If I Had $1,000,000
I'd build a tree fort in our yard.
If I Had $1,000,000
You could help, it wouldn't be that hard.
If I Had $1,000,000
Maybe we could put put a little tiny fridge in there somewhere

The meme is called: "If you have a million dollars..." The premise seems easy enough. Describe what you would do if you had a million dollars. Post the rules and the list and tag some other unsuspecting souls.

If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you an exotic pet (Like a llama or an emu)
If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (All them crazy elephant bones)
If I Had $1,000,000 I'd buy your love

So, this is the point at which I'm supposed to share what I would actually do with a million dollars. First, I would pay off all outstanding debts, including some old medical bills and the rest of the mortgage. Then, I would buy us a couple of reliable automobiles, not a K-car, but a Chevy HHR (teal, of course) and whatever car my wife picked out for herself, probably a Chevy Impala or something of that nature. Also, in that first bit of spending, the best care we could find (insurance, medical, dental, vision, psychiatric, chiropractic, life coaching, personal training, extreme makeover, whatever it takes). Then, after a few months maybe, a vacation getaway to wherever... anywhere would be fine, as long as it's far away and has no relatives or stress... maybe a cruise, yeah... a cruise fits the bill. How about a Caribbean cruise and an Alaskan cruise? Okay, sure. I like that. Then, maybe sell this house and buy one that's a little bigger and built a little better, nothing grandiose or extreme. An RV for future vacations? Maybe a small or mid-size one. There would be some sensible donations to deserving charitable causes. Maybe there would be something left to invest for a small, but comfortable supplemental income so that my wife could start her freelance graphic design business full-time and I could write full-time (even though a part-time job would still be on the menu). I've probably overspent, but this meme didn't come with any clauses saying that if I tagged 5 other people, I would really get the million dollars, so it's all a fantasy anyway. In my fantasy, I would be a very happy person.

If I Had $1,000,000
We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I Had $1,000,000
We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
If I Had $1,000,000
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner.

This is the part where I post the rules of the meme and tag 5 others:

Instructions :
Proposition: If you Have $1,000,000.00…
Requirements: continue above sentences
Tag Mode: 5 bloggers
Link: Add your anchor and post link below.

What They Do With Their $1 Million.
1. SYH will spend for Family
2. Miche will give to the needy
3. Montessorimum will keepsake
4. Lovely Mummy will spend & save
5. MummyInVain will fully utilise
6. Babyfiona will buy house and open business
7. MonkeyWong will go for a long vacation
8. Emila Yusof will realise her dream
9. Mariuca will open a Perfume Gallery
10.Janice Ng will upgrade house and go for long vacation
11.Hin will blog to donate for charity
12.Bobo will invest in property and let her parents go on a holiday.
13. Adrian will spend it all!
14. Brad will spend all of his money on foolish gadgets
15.Danielle will buy a cottage in the woods and never look back
16. Brown Baron will hold a $17,500 blog contest.
17. Bobby will be on a World vacation forever.

18. Wolfgang will try to live, fix the things that can be fixed with what money can buy, and (hopefully) live happily ever after (feel free to shorten to include only the linked part when you repost please).

HERE’S MY PICKS: The following people are tagged with this meme.
1. Epimenides
2. Ingrid
3. David
4. Josie
5. Zirelda

You know what to do. If you don't want to participate, that's okay too.

If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress, that's cruel)
If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
If I Had $1,000,000 (If I Had $1,000,000)
I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
If I Had $1,000,000 I'd buy your love

That's about all I have in me right now. I will try to write more sometime after daylight arrives if I have time and the words reveal themselves to me. I know that a million dollars can't really buy love, but I wish it could buy forgiveness...

...or a time machine.

If I Had $1,000,000, If I Had $1,000,000
If I Had $1,000,000, If I Had $1,000,000
I'd be rich.